If you have PAIN DURING SEX

This is perhaps the most complex female sexual dysfunction (FSD). There can be a psychological component in women who have been abused or had a painful first sexual experience, but just as often there’s a medical reason. The most common is dryness caused by atrophy of the vaginal tissues when estrogen levels drop. Breastfeeding can also cause temporary dryness. Other possible medical causes, says Naughton, are urinary tract or yeast infections, chronic vulva pain, constipation or hysterectomy. Whatever the cause, once you experience pain, your pelvic muscles can reflexively contract in anticipation when you attempt to have sex, making penetration even more painful.

NATURAL Rx

• Get a lube job! Aloe Cadabra is an all-natural lubricant made with organic aloe vera.  Another option is Sliquid Organics, they make water-based lubricants with no petroleum products or irritants.

• Eat roots and berries Koonce says that vaginal dryness can signal a kidney yin deficiency and suggests adding black mulberries and amaranth to yogurt, snacking on goji berries and spooning maca root powder into smoothies and cereals.

• Try homeopathy Staphysagria is recommended for a tender vaginal area. Boiron pellets are available at health food stores for about $5.

• Do your Kegels! We tend to think of these exercises for tightening the pelvic-floor muscles, but “Kegels help you learn to relax those muscles as well,” says Naughton.

Easter,
A highly important pagan holiday that celebrates the fertility of the spring season and the reproduction that occurs during this important time of year.

Rabbits,
A celebrated animal known for its amazing reproductive capacity. Rabbits are sometimes known to engage in sexual frenzies and the result is…a hell of a lot more rabbits!

Easter Eggs,
Eggs are an important symbol of fertility and were a highly prized symbol during the Easter holiday.

Sunday is the perfect time for staying in bed, eating chocolate and having sex.

The new threesome is me, myself and I.

A woman may for one reason or another want to start getting in touch with her sexuality. It may be that for some reason she did not become familiar with her body through masturbation. The thing is that masturbation can help a woman have a more fulfilling sex life when she’s with her lover because she learns about the things that she likes. If you are just starting or want to improve your very own “me time” here are 6 female masturbation secrets.

Vibrators

Vibrators can give you some of the best orgasms that you will have. If you speak to women who use vibrators you will hear how vibrators provide one of the strongest and most consistent forms of stimulation. They are the hottest sex toys, and their popularity is still growing. As the demand for vibrators increases, often sold under the guise of “personal massagers”, sex toy manufacturers have responded by developing dozens of different types, including bullet vibrators, rabbit vibrators, waterproof vibrators and clitoral vibrators…just to name a few.

Dildos

Dildos are another type of sex toys that are great for the woman that finds all vibrators too intense. Dildos are sex toys designed for vaginal or anal penetration. Dildos don’t ‘do’ anything other than what we make them do (i.e. they don’t have motors or moving parts). The pleasure from dildos is derived almost exclusively through penetration. Many people enjoy the feeling of pressure and fullness that dildos offer. If you are a fan of a particular size then you can simply shop online and get what you desire.

You Have Two Hands

“Our fingers are ideal tools for learning what type of pressure, speed, and stroke work the best,” says Sadie Allison, sex educator and author of Tickle Your Fancy: A Woman’s Guide to Sexual Self-Pleasure.  You have two great orgasm triggers to help you achieve great orgasms. You have your clitoris and your g-spot, but you will not be able to reach them with one hand. Instead of settling for just one good sensation you can have both. You can use both hands and you will reach your peak a lot faster and in a more satisfying way. Bottom line: You’re the master of your own domain. It takes trial and error to figure out what makes you tick. Experiment and you’ll be surprised by the sexy sensations you can provoke.

Do What Feels Right

Go with what your body responds to. If you let yourself get all pent up with worry then it can be difficult to follow what your body is asking you to do. Masturbation is all about what feels good. Try touching yourself in ways you haven’t before and go with the flow.

Set The Mood

Setting the mood is very important when you want to have some play time. The things that you should consider are the atmosphere; do you feel comfortable? Make sure that you will not be distracted by the telephone, people knocking on your door, or any other distractions. You should be completely relaxed so that you can have all the fun possible. One of the most private places to awaken your senses is in the tub. To get started, draw a bubble bath. As you soak in the warm water, your muscle tension will melt.

Help Your Mind

Women are not as visual as men; men like to have a picture in front of them while women make the picture in their minds. That does not mean that you should not try to get some help. Some women find reading erotica a great way of getting in the mood for play time. If you have a particular niche that you like then you can get some of these stories online and they are a great masturbation starter.

A woman will usually take an average of close to twenty minutes to reach her orgasm!

It is not always easy to get a woman to orgasm before the guy…unless he knows what he is doing. It is not just about length of the sexual encounter, it is also about the things that a man can do to get her to that moment; that does not mean that timing is not important, a woman will usually take an average of close to twenty minutes to reach her orgasm, but you cannot rely on repetitiveness if you want to get her there. Foreplay is incredibly important because it gets the oven warm before the dough goes in. Foreplay together with the following techniques and positions will ensure that she will reach orgasm every time.

Missionary Plus

You may not know what missionary plus is, because usually people do not talk about it much, but it is a variation of the missionary position. Just like on regular missionary the man will be on top and she will be on the bottom, but the plus stands for an item that you will need; that item is a pillow. Placing the pillow under her lower back puts her in a different angle. The objective is for the penis to hit her g-spot with every thrust. When done right the lady will have one of the strongest orgasms that she has ever experienced, and the best thing is that it does not take much more effort than missionary. There is no reason not to try this if you are having sex in bed because the pillows will be handy.

Cowgirl

Though not all women find this position appealing, it is one of the most effective ones for her to reach orgasm. The reason for that is, you cannot mess this one up unless you try to do too much. She is in control and she knows where the right spot is; so she will play to that.  All that a guy has to do is literally lay back and enjoy the ride. However be warned that this position is tiring on a woman’s legs because they do most of the work, and hands can get a bit tired as well so you should not expect her to be there for the entire time. Get her warmed up on other positions and you can use this as the finisher.  Giddy up!

Tight Squeeze

This position is a favorite where she lays on her stomach and he penetrates from behind while on top of her. This position allows for the penis to hit the front wall of the vagina, and that means…the g-spot. There is also a lot of contact which is highly valued by women. Whichever position you try, you should always keep in mind that on average a man will reach orgasm a lot faster than a woman, so do try oral sex and extra foreplay on her. These positions are great, but after all; it is you that she wants to give her the next orgasm. Do not keep sex monotone, be a little adventurous and you will give her the best sex of her life.

The best way to guarantee yourself a really good quality blow job is....encouragement.

When it comes to oral sex for either gender, good techniques are a bit of an art form. This makes it important to be comfortable to talk about it, ask directions and even read about different methods. Any expert will tell you one of the best ways to learn is from mistakes. When it comes to blowjobs there are just some major mistakes you want to avoid at all costs. These four are at the top of the list for steering clear of.

Having a Dry Mouth

Let’s face it; a lot of nookie happens after a few cocktails. This can mean you’re heading toward the bedroom with a dry or pasty mouth and tongue. If this is the case you’ll want to grab a glass of water. Giving a blowjob with a dry mouth is uncomfortable for both partners and can even cause micro abrasions on the skin. Grab a glass of water to have near you while going down on your man.

Thinking a Little Nipping Might Be Nice?

Very few men are going to want you to bite their Johnson. The general rule here is unless he asks- twice, leave your teeth out of the picture. Lots of tongue, lips and using your hands are a great idea. Having a lot of saliva is an excellent idea. But do not use your teeth unless you hear him beg for it.

Forgetting the ‘Boys’

Blowjobs that treat the balls like they are invisible are lame. If you’re nervous about heading to this area then go slow and caress his thighs a lot. Your hands are just as important as your mouth when giving head. It’s also important to remember he has very sensitive thighs and will enjoy a gentle cupping of his testis as you give him pleasure.

Gagging or Acting Grossed Out

This is the most important mistake to avoid of all. You wouldn’t like it if the role was reversed. As long as your man has good hygiene it isn’t gross and you shouldn’t make him feel that way; not even if you’re trying to ‘joke.’ Have a plan for what you are going to do with the semen (by every account swallowing is a man’s favorite) so that you don’t have a clumsy finish to your loving gesture. If you steer clear of these mistakes you’ll be well on your way to rocking your man’s world with the best blowjob he’s had!

Spontaneity...create a lasting moment!

Those moments couples spend making love can erase an entire week or stress from the workplace. For this reason, among others, many people want to know ways to make it last. Here are a few tips to consider trying.

Increase Touching

When was the last time you gave your partner a foot massage? What about giving them a sponge bath, or maybe take a shower together? Many times, with busy schedules and work weeks we start to rush through our intimate moments with our lovers. One of the best ways to make your love making session last longer, is to put a little massage into it. Spend some time touching your partner in areas you love on their body, or places they love to be touched. Try alternating between firm and feathery touches as well.

The Ring

There are rings on the market to go around the base of the penis to help make the erection last longer and prolong ejaculation. These seem to be one of the most popular methods that couples use.  In addition to slowing the orgasm down, certain styles will rub a woman’s body in a manner to give her more pleasure as well. Cock rings can be gotten a hold of fairly inexpensively and have a lot of positive feedback.

Taking a Breather

One of the safest and most tried and true methods of stretching intercourse out as long as possible is to take breathers…pause for a moment. You can also try switching things up and moving to positions that are a little less stimulating. This may mean creating a new position or to stopping altogether until pulses return to the normal rate. You don’t have to stop completely, you can move to other activities that are equally as enjoyable until you are able to continue without bursting.

Creams & Over the Counter Help

There are many different products on the market that have claims to help prolong intercourse and pleasure. Before trying any of these you should consider the product seriously. Whether it’s something you’re planning on ingesting or something that is topical you want to know what you’re using. Check out any reviews and read the list of ingredients.

Cozy is comfortable, but not sexy

Couples lucky enough to be emotionally genuine with each other share so many real moments, they need to pay special attention to creating magical ones because great sex requires magic. Recapture a good sex life but only once you admit that reigniting lust and romance takes creativity and a commitment of time and energy.

There are so many aspects to sexuality that are important to explore when you’re in a healthy relationship. It can bring you and your partner together and keep you close when there are tough times. One great way to get creative in the bedroom is to explore masturbation with each other and on your own. Many people make the mistake of just considering masturbation to be a single person activity, when in fact it’s recommended for couples as well. Here are a few reasons it’s important to continue masturbating while in a relationship.

Learn What You Like

Sex can still be taboo to many people, leaving countless couples who haven’t self-explored in some time. We are constantly shedding skin cells, so it stands to reason our skin sensitivity can change. We know our tastes can certainly change. So even if you had a heavy hand with masturbation while you were single, you should still keep the act up when you have settled down with a great lover. Exploring your body on a regular basis will help insure you still know what pleases your body and how to keep those feelings in the bedroom.

Show Your Partner What You Like

Many times couples don’t actually think about taking the time to actually show their partner how they like to be touched. A person may spend hours agonizing over how to tell their lover they would like it if they touched them this way or that way, when in actuality they would do the job so much better if they offered to show them. The next time you want to be touched a certain way, try guiding their hand through the motion.

Mutual Masturbation

Learning how to touch your lover in precisely the same way they would, can be an erotic experience. Exploring many areas in the bedroom will enrich the relationship and give it staying power. Being able to feel comfortable with all aspects of sexuality can create a safe and intimate environment for any couple.

Keeping a Healthy Sexual Appetite

One of the best reasons to continue masturbating when in a long term relationship is it helps keep your sexual appetite healthy. It is true that in order to have a healthy relationship, it has to be built with a great loving foundation. This includes communication, but every couple that has staying power will point to healthy sexuality as the glue of a relationship when they are asked to speak openly.

Communication is sexy!

Being in a relationship can mean many things and certainly at the top of the list of areas to consider, is the bedroom. Keeping your love life active and imaginative can be the ticket to weathering all sorts of storms in a relationship. This will mean different things to everyone out there, but being able to throw a little dirty talk down while you’re between the sheets is a great way to keep it interesting.

1. Start Outside of the Bedroom

One great way to work your way into talking dirty is to take some of the pressure off. Start out with asking your partner what they like and don’t like. This will not only get you started with dialogue about sex, but it will also work towards what you really might want to talk about. Do this outside of a sexual context, and you’ll be surprised what you’ll learn.

2. Know Their Fantasies

When you are working through those conversations about what each other enjoys, make sure to ask specifically about fantasies. These are great ways to have a topic to start whispering about when you are making love. Many couples struggle with what to say when they first try talking dirty and that’s why having a ‘go to’ subject, like one of their fantasies, can be a great way to get started.

3. Bring It Up During Foreplay

When you’re working a little dirty talk into your bedroom activities it’s a nice idea to get it out there just as things are warming up. This gives you a chance to try something casual like, “You like me touching you here….don’t you?” It’s not in the heat of the moment so you are able to have a greater chance your partner will respond with actual words as well. When the two of you are communicating while working towards getting it hot & heavy, the overall experience will be even better.

4. Keep It Simple

When you are just starting to talk dirty in the bedroom it’s a good idea to work some simple, sexy phrases in between the touches and kisses. Don’t try to tell a story or get too technical right from the start. You should also avoid being bossy, unless you’re going for a bit of domination or role-play. Questions and comments are a great way to start, such as, ‘I love it when you touch me there!’ Or, when they’re doing something that feels good, don’t be afraid to let them know by moaning and groaning….a great way for primal instincts to show off. Remember to have a light heart and some fun while trying it out. Most importantly, the best way to get good at talking dirty is just like anything else, practice, practice, practice.  But above all else, have fun!

All couples will eventually get into a rut with their sex lives. It may be because of changing situations–like a new baby–or you could just be bored. Whether you like it or not, sex is an important part of your relationship, and you need to work on ways that you can make it better. Talk to your partner about the different ways you can spice up your sex life.

I love my job because I get to help people and I also get to constantly explore and test out anything that has to do with increasing one’s sexual pleasure.  I realize that most people may not have the time, energy or resources to spice up their sex life, so I wanted to write about the things that you can do for very little money and very little time that might make having sex a lot more fun!

Read to your lover!  A bedtime story is the perfect aphrodisiac.  Affection goes a long way to a partner who reads aloud in bed.  Being a great lover involves communicating effectively and being sensitive to your partner’s needs.  Reading aloud to your partner is a special magic that put you straight into your lovers mind.

Massage candles are soy wax candles that burn at a cooler temperature, then melt into amazing massage oils. You might wonder, “Who has time for that?”, but it doesn’t need to be an all-night activity. They melt quickly and smell fantastic.  A few minutes of massage with something that is warm and feels great, might change your whole night.  Candlelight, of course, creates a more romantic setting.  When you’re having fun and experiencing pleasure, it almost always stays with you the next day.

Vibrators come in so many shapes, styles, sizes and intensities. If you are someone who has never used one you should try it.  If you are someone who uses one regularly, try a new one.  I’m writing about them because for many women they are a necessity. There are also several that can be used during intercourse. A tapping touch can activate more nerves than a flat touch. Using a small vibrator on the under-side of a guy’s penis can also be thrilling.  If a woman or a man feels that a vibrator will be replacing them…don’t fret, it will simply enhance what you already share.

Lubricants can also open up a whole new world. Some women need one all the time, some never do. Much like vibrators there are so many different kinds to try. There are lubricants that are:  water based, silicone based, organic, warming (heat up) and flavored. Even if you are someone who has never used one, you can try a few to add something new.

I do think that people need variety to feel excited and alive.  The idea is to always have fun, and keep things flowing and harmonious. Try to stay relaxed and always focus on engaging the other person by trying to figure out what sparks their interests.  Once you’ve learned these lusty lessons, you’ll have many more sexual possibilities. So, grab your partner and celebrate with an all-nighter that’s sure to teach him or her a lesson or two…never to be forgotten!

Welcome to Love Shack Canada’s Sex Toy Blog!  It’s here that we’re going to have a lot of fun and talk about everything from Anal Sex to Zen Sex.  We’ll always take the time to answer any questions you may have about sexuality, a sex toy you’re curious about; or anything else that’s on your mind.  To start things off this week, we get this question A LOT…so Love Shack thought it would be a great place to start our blog!

Q: Why does it take my girlfriend forever to get aroused and I’m ready to go all the time?  What am I doing wrong?

A: One thing that’s great to know right out of the gate is that men are visual beings and women are more into the thoughts and eroticism of sex.  Men love to ‘see’ things, while women love to ‘think’ and fantasize about their erotic experiences.  Men are very quick and to the point, while women like to take their time and slow it down.  Try to imagine your girlfriend’s libido as a pot of water set to low, waiting to boil.  Whereas your pot of water is always set on high….guess who’s going to boil first?  Foreplay is an instrumental part to insuring you both ‘boil’ around the same time.  Foreplay should begin way before you’re entering the bedroom.  Believe it or not, those little things that take pressure off her are the things that give her that ‘extra’ sexual energy and desire for you.  You’d be pleasantly surprised to see what doing a load of dishes, washing some laundry or choosing any other chore that she hasn’t been able to get to would do for you later on in the evening. For some women, porn is fun to watch.  Unfortunately, many men take their lovemaking cues from it…on fast-forward: “Five seconds of kissing, 8 seconds of breast stimulation, 30 seconds of manual stimulation, 2 minutes of oral sex for her, 20 minutes of oral sex for him, then intercourse for as long and hard as they can keep it up.” Try to keep in mind, the more you vary the script…the better she’ll respond.  Little kisses and whispers outside of the bedroom, soft caresses, shoulder rubs and erogenous zone reminders are a few of the things you can focus on to ensure she’s much more receptive when you do go behind closed doors.  Keep in mind, the brain is the biggest erogenous zone we own, so remember to play with it.  Get as much of her body in the game as you can before you head south. Aim for her lips, behind her ears, the back of her neck, the sides of her body and just below her breasts.  If you really want to rock her world, keep in mind she requires a long simmer before she’ll heat to a rolling boil. It all starts with pressing the right buttons.